No Pain No Gain?

To feel no pain. A litany lived by many. Stay safe, we think.
We might try to hide. But pain rebirths itself in every cell of our bodies from time to time. We have no choice, it decides when to enter our lives.

Portlandia, Portland Oregon

We tend to hear the word pain and feel that it is associated with loss. Rivers of tears, darkened nights, the boundless echoes of thunder. The Unknown, that scary, uncomfortable place. But what of the other kind of pain?

The one that delivers your child, the breaking of your heart with utter joy when you witness the sunshine bouncing off the new hairs after chemo, the expanding of your dinner table as a loved one introduces someone who makes them sing with delight? Pain, yes. Because behind this feeling you know you are given a gift, and that someday it could be taken away. It is the pain of recognition that changes you.

So how do we hold on to the sheer expanse of those special moments?

This “painless woman” might be brave in her surgery but would she also attempt starting a new business or leaving an abusive husband? Physical pain hurts but emotional and mental pain can destroy. Would this person who doesn't fear a fall on slippery streets or tackling a half-marathon also be brave enough to assert herself in the workplace?
Are some of us just wired to feel less pain?
But like most of us, notice as you run through your experiences of pain. Most pain we feel is because we didn't get something we wanted. Often due to love. People are known to betray us in the most hurtful ways. Then there is the pain from an accomplishment. We might sacrifice hard hours of alone time in our side hustle to find that it turns into more. And then it might lead to joy, eventually.

Stop Living in Fear (easier said than done)

Of course we are fearful. All of us, yes every last one of us. We’re afraid of a multitude of past sins, and fearful of our financial futures. We’re afraid that we won't be able to give our children the advantages we want for them, and we worry that we are not doing enough for our aging parents.

Most of all however, we are afraid of being found out. Of being recognized for what someone else thinks is not enough and that we’ve been faking it all along.

We’re fearful of people knowing that we are a fraud.

Oh, there are all kinds of frauds, many of which are ultimately harmless and that just remind us that we are human. No, I didn’t really run the last half-marathon in under 2 hours, turns out it was 2:01. No, I didn’t finish the challenge for 60 days straight yoga. I woke up on day 51 with a migraine, but I did do it the other 59 days, doesn’t that count, it does? Doesn’t it?

We tell our children to be respectful of their teachers, but we don’t tell them what we say about all authority under our breath.

We say we are mindful and live in the moment and trust the Universe. But there are mornings at 2a.m., when we are truly afraid.

We keep our cool and display temperance in public around the staff room table, but still we raise our middle finger at the jerk who cut in front of us on the drive home.

Flooded with Love

And Life will go on. Sunny, blue skies for the last few days. Calgary is a city held up by Love.

Thank you to everyone for your unselfish acts of helping others. For those of you still in crisis, we are awed by your resilience and your courage. You have taught us a lot about ourselves.

Calgary - Sink or Swim?

Calgary is basically in the middle of the Prairies. The two pseudo rivers that typically run through it are a far cry from real rivers that many of us grew up with. For the last few days however, our city has been awash with rain and flood water. An occurrence that we were told in 2008 was a once in a century happening.

It’s interesting to see how the stories have unfolded, how the city has banded together and the perennially negative have continued that way. I have stayed off social media for a reason, the local News has been sufficient and still I have heard all that I need to know. How many days or weeks will this situation be centre-stage in a city that is usually dry.

How long will the stories of disaster and loss be a part of our city’s psyche? I have discarded from my brain, the news items about sewage backup and looting, about people taking out their canoes on the fast moving river to get a better perspective (Darwin Award). Instead, I have tried to assimilate that strangers bring coffee to those cleaning up their yards and that there is a local plumber offering free service to those who need it. Then there’s the news segment of an elderly woman holding hands with her equally elderly spouse. “When I saw my deck floating away with all the flower pots intact, all I could do was laugh" she said. That is what I want to remember.

The Calgary Stampede is just around the corner, 9 days to bring the Greatest Outdoor Show on Earth to life.