Let it Alone

A man is rich in proportion to the number of things

which he can afford to let alone.

Thoreau

If we were more conscious of our Things, Emotions, Judgments, and Comparisons who could we be?

our Things

What do we keep? A common question when cleaning out our basement, garage or the home of the deceased. What the heck is important to me? Our task then becomes a combination of dust and sweat and a walk down memory lane. Why do we have all this stuff?

Let it Alone: Things, Emotions, Judgments, Comparison

When we decide however to not bring these items into our dwelling, when we have paused long enough to say “No, I don’t need this” or “let me think about it” we have chosen to increase the value of our belongings. Our cluttered shelves and closets, our arrangement of knick-knacks, and boxes of old photos and trophies have the ability to keep us tied to who we once were. They could even be blocking your path to whom we are on the way to becoming. Too many things slowed down the progress of the settlers travelling to new lands even back then.

If you had one trunk to take on your voyage, how would you choose? And then halfway to your destination, you were told to skinny up those choices, what would you then decide?

Once there was a man that had to leave his home quickly, his caregiver had died. This man packed his belongings in one box. Clean socks, a few pairs of jeans, a t-shirt or two. He walked out the door unencumbered. He was ready to start a new adventure. I saw it with my own eyes.

If only it were that easy, you think. Right?

Some of us have hobbies we will get to someday, items that we might need down the road and stored items of grown children. We comfort ourselves with these things. Why are we afraid to let go of them? We use these Things as an excuse to not look at our Now. Leave the accumulation of things alone.

our Emotions

I should be angrier, she said to me. I should just hate him for what he did to me. But I cannot. I cannot give him more of my energy, my life, my heart. She told me this and she could be anyone you know. She could be speaking of her father who ignored and then disowned her, she could be referring to her step-brother who was a little too touchy. She might be speaking about her neighbour who has late into the night parties or the volunteer leader who always knows best.

What she decided though was to move on. To leave it behind, she would not make it a part of her future story. Not easy right? But she got to choose. Only she was in charge of how she would feel. What she chose was to be Brave, to trust that she had been given a lesson. She would not give away her control to someone else. And hence the petty small office gossip and the loud abrasive person in line at the movie theatre did not enter her. She let it go because she’d been practising all this time.

Emotions will come and go. Release the ones that don’t heal you. (Tweet This) Leave the emotions alone.

our Judgments

We judge every day. We see it quickly when others are judgmental but we don’t necessarily see it when we do it so easily. It is probably our hardest lesson to learn because we are human. We have a need to preserve our belief, we have been known to defend ourselves with no limit. We might not have consciously chosen our beliefs, but yet they are so instilled in our heads that we do not question them. It is much easier to just go along with how we have always seen the world.

But the day comes when we are thrown against a wall of what can no longer be our truth. It could be that someone we love would betray us that way, that after everything we give to our work they still want more, or that the Church we were raised in told us to go.

And although we have lived through being judged we still feel that we are okay to judge others. We are so afraid of not being loved, appreciated, and cherished. Not only in our homes but in our offices too. We can pretend and conjure up the best of stories to appear to be important. And we keep trying and trying because we don’t want to be judged. We don’t want to be the last one chosen. (Tweet This)

We need to remember that it is only a judgment, ours or theirs, it is not carved in stone. Think about who you are in this world. No one has the right nor should they have the power to turn you into someone you are not. Ever. Leave the judgments alone.

our Comparisons

We really shouldn’t go down this path because it will steal your heart and your soul. No one we know has had our life, no one we know has had our sadness. No one tells you what frightens them in the middle of the night because then you might think that you are “better” than they are. We are bigger and smaller, richer and poorer, healthier and less healthy, smarter or not. None of us are perfect although some of us try hard to stay ahead of the curve. Annoying isn’t it? And I'm only guessing that you just did a comparison. You thought of someone who makes you crazy, didn’t you?

Because when someone totally sets your head on fire with envy or dislike there is a reason that you feel that way. Probably a reason we don’t want to hear. Could it be that they made a choice? To learn more, exercise instead of sit, save rather than spend, be honest instead of fearful of the truth. And let's not dismiss the possibility that they are uninformed, lazy, rude, or imposters. Yes, The world is full of people just trying to help us make sense of it all. (Tweet This)

We’re all just trying. Sometimes we’re Zen-like in our reactions, and sometimes we just stink. We’re all just learning. Leave the comparisons alone. 

Could we work on one of these this week, can we loosen our hold on our Things, Emotions, Judgments, and Comparisons?

It is up to each of us to choose. As Thoreau wisely said, what can you afford to let alone to become a Better You?

So what will you let alone and what will you gain? (Tweet This)