Ed-U-cate Yourself

A decade ago, I started down the path of getting a divorce. Not an easy process if you are raised a Catholic. Even as an adult, the strings of beliefs can hold you tight in a relationship that no longer serves you.

I had many advantages, I had good health, children who did not display negative behaviour and caused no alarm with their strong academics, I had an education and a good position. But still I stayed.

And I know there are many who do not have these benefits.

As I moved through a wonderful program, aimed at healing a marriage breakdown, I encountered many women (and some men) who courageously told their stories of emotional and physical abuse.

And one topic came up consistently. I didn't leave because I didn't know if I had the money to survive.

So when I am sitting with young women who are hesitant to finish their schooling, I remember some of the women who were in my program and wonder how they are doing now.

Anna - was a teacher, she had a job but she was not educated to stand up for herself. She was constantly late getting to her students because her 250lb husband

Rosie oh Rosie Project

For your Summer Reading Fun, try this one:


I just finished reading .

It has been sitting in my pile of books for some time now, don't ask why I didn't get to it earlier, because you probably already know some of the reasons. The least of which is, I don't like reading a book while it's being hooted and tooted in the media. I don't want to be swayed as I have in the past, of grabbing the latest NY bestseller, and absolutely detesting it. I wait for someone I know to say they recommend it. Because Life is too short for a bad book.

If you haven't read The Rosie Project though, give yourself a treat and pick it up soon.  You won't regret it. If you can, don't read the notes, don't Google what this book is about. Let the story unfold for you, as it does each day, with each turn of the page.


In it you will read of real life, relationships, the kindness of people and how we are all quirky, although some more than others. You might even see the similarities of a well-known TV character.

I can't give any more away because I don't want to ruin the surprises hidden in  this easy reading, fast paced walk through the lives of a group of people linked together through the actions of their hearts.

and Yes, I am aware that the story continues with The Rosie Effect which will be added to my shelf of books waiting to be read.

July Create - Crazy about Canvas Frames

This year has been about trying my hands at some new things. As a newbie on Pinterest, a person could truly get lost in projects for a week without coming up for air. Do you remember those days, of endless Play, of lying on someone's lawn and watching the clouds go by?

Anyone who knows me well, knows how much I appreciate re-creating a commercial idea and making it myself instead. And if a person can do this inexpensively, bonus!

So here is my July Create, from my Pinterest Board - Things to try in 2015, instructions courtesy of Designer Trapped in a Lawyer's Body. This is an easy afternoon project and gives results which can be hung by evening at a fraction of the usual cost if you were to order online.

Two of my favourite photos taken while on holidays, will  now grace my office wall where I can enjoy them. The most time consuming part of all was shopping for the supplies. Then all you have to do is crank up the music, spread out and begin...

Supplies from Michaels

Paint on Mod Podge

Keep it Simple! This was an enjoyable way to Play in July or anytime.

      

"Texturize"

Relaxing in Seattle

                             

Crazy about Canvas Frames reminded me that    not all good looking results need to be difficult. Sometimes we just need to take a leap and be brave.

Now tell me, what have you been postponing because it could be difficult? What could you try today?

 Doing Coffee in Portland

Side by Side and Steps Apart

The new building was eventually completed across from my work site. See One nail at a Time for the background story and it has continued to provide further interest as time has gone on.

The building is not inexpensive, it sits in  a well-established community with large trees providing shade and close proximity to thoroughfares.

From my windows, I can see the two sides of this building, twins in structure but no longer identical.

The occupants of each side moved in within days of each other. Their respective moving trucks blocking the intersection and backing up with a variety of beeps and whistles. The owners did not appear to know each other.

Within days of move-in, it became apparent that the shared walls separated very different people.

SanFrancisco

On the left, I could see her awaken early, open blinds, unpack boxes and settle in. In the first week, two giant containers filled with red and white flowers sat in welcome at the entrance to her front door. 

On the right, odds and ends have been stuffed into an overflowing blue box which has been sitting at the front door for a few weeks. And when I look at the upstairs window, it looks like the drapes are always…half drawn.

She on the left, watered her share of the lawn for the first few weeks. I'd see her place it carefully to cover her own space as if not to intrude. Now she puts her sprinkler in the middle, equally watering both spaces. She too has noted their differences.

What do they have in common, I wonder. Life has brought them together. She on the left in her home, and she on the right in a house.

Is there a reason that Life brings us together? (Click to Tweet)

What’re you selling Girl?

Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.

Janis Joplin

In one of my many roles, I meet young women looking to improve themselves. Sometimes, they arrive in tank tops, that leave little to the imagination. Sometimes, they arrive in shortie shorts that only in recent years were only shown off at a beach. And because of their manner and the way they are presenting themselves, I worry.
 

I want to tell them things from my almost-60 year old self, things I've learned along the way. Most are good girls, they are doing what everyone else is doing, what they see in store windows, in magazines and on television. But when did it become okay to ask for attention in such a blatant way? And what exactly are they asking for? Do they see their body as their commodity?

commodity

[kuh-mod-i-tee] /kəˈmɒd ɪ ti/

1. an article of trade or commerce, especially a product as distinguished from a service.

2. something of use, advantage, or value.

3. a quantity of goods.

4. a good or service whose wide availability typically leads to smaller profit margins and diminishes the importance of factors other than price

5. one that is subject to ready exchange or exploitation within a market 

The body is a beautiful thing. We are meant to take care of it, nourish it, and do what we can to keep it healthy but I don’t believe that we are to worship it in front of a mirror of strangers.

What can we share with these young women from the lessons we've learned? It is our obligation and privilege to pass on our lessons to them by example. Here are just a few of my thoughts.

Cultivate a good heart, it will bring you lots of attention because people will notice it. Your heart will expand in promise as time goes on..

Learn compassion, there is nothing more attractive than kindness. When you aim to be kind every day it becomes a habit, one that you don’t want to break.

Learn something each day. Read books of all kinds, ask questions of anyone who interests you, look things up on the internet. Knowledge is invigorating.

Get an education, in something. Strive to be a master of something you love to do. Having the confidence that you can survive on your own, will prevent you from making choices because you have no money. Always know that you don’t have to settle.

Share. Your smiles, your wealth, your enthusiasm, your courage, your strength. You might be surprised what you get back from the act of giving. And when it feels like you have nothing to share, is the time you will reap the grandest rewards. Ask any volunteer!

Don’t give yourself away with no discrimination. Your thoughts, your feelings, your secrets, are yours for a reason. Keep some things sacred. There is only one You.

Your body should be given to someone who treasures it. It has been put together with your care in each moment of your life. Don’t give it way too freely.

Your beauty is not your only commodity, make your mind and your will strong, because with time most bodies will begin to fade but your character will always keep you beautiful.


coming next week: more words about getting an education...