Be Still My Mind

There's a man in my Friday night yoga class who reminds me of my old friend Dan.

I don't know his name and I don't need to. He looks sort of like Dan, speaks in a careful, unassuming way and then when you are least expecting it, will let a wickedly hilarious remark just slide in.

I remember my teenage days with my friend Dan, while we each navigated our way into adulthood. Now we live on opposite sides of the country and our paths seldom cross without emails rapidly flying back and forth in the planning.

We met some years ago in Vancouver, together with another friend Eddy, who was up from Petaluma. Together for a few days, we walked along the sea-wall, stopped for endless cups of decaf coffee (for Dan), had sushi, and talked, photographed and laughed. They humoured me by eating as many meals as possible out-doors. I ate a lot of fish that weekend, I who had escaped the cold dreary March in my home town.

At a wedding, I introduced Eddy to the girl who would become his wife. I wonder where Dan's wife is working right now. Was it Cats, that she'd danced in?

Breathe slowly, in and out, stop thinking, in and out. Stop my monkey mind, too much coffee today.

Another time, we met in Montreal, and drank draft at the pub which was down the street from our high school. How do so many decades go by so quickly? There were a few of us, old friends joining together in an informal reunion of sorts. Catching up with the present, reminiscing of the past. Remembering how it was one of us who instigated the petition to allow the wearing of jeans to school.

He even looks like Dan from behind. Stop it, breathe slowly, in and out, stop thinking.

Some years later, Dan stepping off the train in red pants. College days of him throwing his head back while he had a good laugh.

And all this happened in my head even before the three beautiful OOOMMMs that started our class.

Funny how familiarity beckons us. Unsuspecting we are and eager to follow our thoughts down the rabbit hole.

Fog

I was admittedly distracted this morning as I made my at an unusual time to an infrequent (thank goodness!) location.

Good health has been a blessing in my life and attending even the pre-appointment for a "procedure" requires some meditation and deep breathing.

And that is how I found myself at a stop light quite oblivious as to how I had gotten there. "Being in the moment" surely does not include putting your car on autopilot. (Although how is it that our cars do sometimes drive themselves to the location we want? Come on, I know you've done it too!)

When I shook my way out of my reverie I saw a white Yaris changing lanes more often than was necessary (slow down buddy), an orange Durango with its hood up at the side of the road (note to self - get gas on the way home) and a cream coloured BMW 325i with an almost-rusted-through passenger side that was probably quite pretty at some point.

The woman beside me was talking over her right shoulder. Her car held at least three children who were badly in need of orthodontic work. "Good luck" I say silently, "there go some of your vacation plans".

And so we all travelled in the same direction for those moments in time, even though our destinations were all quite different. I wonder what each of those drivers thought when they saw me?

Slow Man Walking

For several months now, my path has crossed a stranger every morning while I wait at the top of the hill to turn left. He has been dressed head-to-toe in black and slowly crosses the 4 lanes of traffic. I wish I could say that I am patient, but his crossing is annoyingly slow and sauntering. I am not my best when I see him take his time, oblivious to the traffic held up and waiting for him to cross safely.

His black hood covers most of his face, his black almost ankle length coat (surely not the easiest to walk in), and the black gloves and black backpack have made him difficult to see in the headlights. Oh, did I say slow? His ear buds (slowly) bounce as he crosses the four lanes. At times I’ve wondered if he is listening to meditative music, if he is recovering from an illness, if he just doesn’t want to get there. He appears to be healthy, no recognizable debilitating limp, no neck brace that limits movement. I try to be patient, but most often my inner voice is screaming “get a move on fella, get a move on fella…” and stronger variations of this depending on the urgency of my schedule.

This morning, slow annoying man had removed his hood, had on a short walking jacket and actually walked fast! He was bald. What caused the change? Faster music, improved health, a new job, a new girlfriend, new medication? I will never know. He is just part of the story.

Let’s see if his speed continues tomorrow.

Go to Yoga - check

Finally did it! Have always wanted to take Yoga, and now I am officially "practising" it. Not a foreign concept to me, the philosophy part of it comes naturally. Have always been kind of a meditation fool, but we'll see what my body thinks about it tomorrow...hope to strengthen, tone and relax. Oh, it was hard to leave at the end of the class. When was the last time YOU got to be still?